Pull Yourself Together:
As Bought From TV

I don’t watch a lot of TV. Not because I don’t want to. But simply because I’ve had to make a conscious decision to not own a TV because of the black hole that can be basic cable. The minute I turn it on, I revert back to toddler years, where anything shiny and moving takes the form of entertainment. Example: I was house-sitting for my friend the other day when I realized that I had been watching an infomercial for a cleaning product for 30 minutes—I probably thought I was watching a rerun of The Nate Berkus Show. In any case, this is isn’t the first time I’ve been stuck in an infomercial vortex. In fact, I’ve often taken it one step further and bought whatever product they’re trying to sell me. Which brings me to “As Seen on TV” products that I fully endorse. See, not all of them are Pajama Jeans® (Google it and be horrified). Some actually have good use and work. Starting with the product that is near and dear to my heart (and face and legs and underarms), the No!No! hair remover system. IT WORKS AT REMOVING MY ITALIAN SHAME. And if your cat has the same problem, so does the FURminator.

clockwise, l-r: NO!NO! HAIR REMOVER SYSTEM, $270.00, Neiman Marcus; FOOD SAVER VACUUM SEALER, $141.29, Amazon; MAGIC BULLET, $49.99, Target; FURMINATOR DESHEDDING TOOL FOR CATS, $52.99, 1800PetMeds.

Comments

  1. Diana Diana says:

    omg – albertina, have you seen the SCHTICKY??? I really, really, really want it. https://schticky.com/. yeah, vince is back.

  2. DawnBee says:

    I got my mom the Magic Bullet for Xmas 2 yrs ago, and for the next 2 months I was subjected to a never-ending supply of extremely questionable shakes, smoothies, possibly radioactive material and unidentified floating objects that I didn’t think I was going to survive. I knew eventually they(my dad was part of the conspiracy) would get tired of it, I just didn’t think it would take so gastrointestinally, painfully long!! lol! I started giving them food recipes, pointing them away from the veggie laden drinks they had been making. I can say that the Magic Bullet works, 100%. The problem is who uses it! :P . Hehe!

    Oh, and does the No!No! start working right away? What does it feel like? One more question…. Which one are you using? There are 2 different types. One, I think, is more powerful than the other. If anyone one knows, I would love to hear back, my sister’s birthday is coming up and man is she hairy!! LOL!! Kidding!

    Thanks!
    DawnBee <3

  3. Albertina says:

    The Magic Bullet has a near and dear place in my heart, partly for the smoothies but also because it works and the commercial features an incredulous old lady in a robe that apparently can’t believe blenders exist.

    The No! No!? It works! I didn’t feel any pain. I may be using the less powerful one but I think I might switch to the extra strength one because my hair is as thick as the smoothies mentioned above.

  4. DawnBee says:

    I think the old lady in the robe’s cigarette must be a fake/prop. I’ve never seen one with the ash that long not fall off into a plate of food or a drink. I was watching, but it never happened. Oh, insomnia….the things I do because of you! hehe!

    There’s also the Tria Laser hair killer doohicky. I looked at it as an xmas gift for my mom. Ha! I love her, but not enough to spend $300+ on a gift that she might never use. She never even unpacks anything we get her for xmas, the bags of years gone by are scattered throughout the garage like the holidays never happened!

    I love the Bullet, in the hands of someone not trying to make some sort of experimental toxic “cleanse”. UGH!
    And I have a confession to make… I am an As Seen on TV junkie. I cannot watch an infomercial without having a mild anxiety attack. In my head i hear…”I need that, I can use that. And if I can’t, I know someone else who can.” See my problem? lol!

  5. Albertina says:

    Diana! How did I miss the schticky? I just checked it out.

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